Glide: Lookin' for soul food and a place to eat

Painting done by an inmate at San Quentin State Prison

Why do we cook?
       Cheffing has evolved into a personality-driven industry which seems to rely on constant growth.  It thrives on expansion and reinvention.  But at its root, at the core of our motivation, there's a little idea that takes all of the pride, all of the trendiness, all of the hype and hysteria; takes it, and fills it with meaning.  There is a driving impulse which gets us into our clogs and chef whites every day.  When the institutional empires, frighteningly untouchable reputations and viral fame is removed --when the ego and dick-swinging is taken out of the picture-- you are left with something beautifully simple.  In its purest form, you have nothing more than a cook feeding a guest.  One human feeding another, with care and energy.  This is a special thing that we, whether we can verbalize it or not, can all feel.  It is a visceral, sentimental, even primal calling which understands food as energy.  As life.

       We are a hip, image-conscious dining public.  We brim with drive and creativity.  As patrons, we are begging, crying-for, picking apart and devouring every up-and-comer who is trying to make a mark with a new restaurant.  Like seagulls to a fishing trawler, we scour for it.  We beg for permission and fight for a space.  Whatever's in front of us we WILL put in our mouths, and we WILL bow down to the chef for showing us the way.  We are looking for it and we will travel great distances to get it.  A good chef with a new concept and a publicist = easy sell to us.  All cynicism aside, this "foodie" trend is pushing boundaries in a positive direction.  We are looking for better ways to eat.  We want to feed our minds.  We want to do right by our bodies.  Trend or not, it is a good thing.
     
       But what about the rest of them?  You know, the ones who don't ogle over Lucky Peach.  The ones who don't know the name of any chef in town.  A people who's priorities lay beyond such luxuries as eating out. The ones who don't frequent these expositions of affluence or hubs of hipsterdom.  I'm sure they are still eating.  Right?

     
Yes, but they are not searching like you and I. 
          Now, I am not talking about your average schmo; grabbin' a burger from the drive-through window, -- from the driver's seat of his tow-truck, flicking the only green leafy thing off of his sweating "meat" patty on to the yellow line, regarding it as "rabbit food."  While you, in the seat next to him, with your helpless, busted truck on the flatbed behind, sitting in utter amazement, listening to the vulgar remarks he belches out to every female you drive passed, knowing full well, he has never made good on his promises to "show" anyone "a good time." -- a sample of the population who generally just hates food...  I am speaking of the severely marginalized population of the Bay Area.  They do not pick and choose what they have for a meal.  They have forgotten how.  How do we connect with those who don't know how to even look?  How do you lure a person to eat well, who would otherwise opt for two bags of Flamin' Hot Cheatos for their dinner (if anything at all) because it's all they can see?  How do you nourish one who's only priority now is satiating a debilitating habit?  A person who gave up the option to do right by themselves a long time ago?

Sunday Church Service

Glide:
       The brain-child of Reverend Cecil Williams, Glide is a truly unique institution.  A church, a free medical and counseling center, a shelter, and a free meals kitchen.  It's been around for over fifty years and is still going strong.  This kitchen which I worked in is a volunteer-based powerhouse, serving three meals a day for over three thousand people.  A tremendous service to a marginalized community in need.

       This particular site is a drastic departure from the theme of cooking I have previously been analyzing.  This "shock to the format" is a fitting reference point, as it represents more than just donated Wonder Bread and cauldrons of instant mashed potatoes.  (These classic soup kitchen champions curiously do not get served at Glide.)  This is cooking.  It is a deeper exploration into why we cook.  It not only applies to what I am doing, but deserves to be outed as the Food Culture stimulus it is.

       Walk through the Tenderloin and look around you.  Shit!  Human shit on the fucking sidewalk!  Prostitutes, disease, hypodermic needles, babbling, ranting, emergency room wristbands, plastic bottles of clear alcohol regretfully sucked dry, possessed individuals with no control over their actions. shopping cart-lives towering so high they are onerous just to look at.  You wonder about the cold San Francisco night and what it's like to sleep out on these streets.  Concrete has a way of sucking the heat out of your body, chilling your core, even when it's warm outside.  This is the state of living when all choice has been abandoned.  The thought of improvement or any form of a future plan does not exist.  It becomes only about the immediate situation; moment by moment; band-aid by band-aid.

       Not once are these individuals actively choosing a direction or a path or a mode.  Agreed, many (not all) have been traditionally marginalized.  Some have grown up with mental illness.  Some have incurred mental illness through a new age of drug use with a new age of drugs, cut with a new age of handicap-inflicting chemicals.  Some live in urban areas where grocery stores do not exists.  Effectual "food desserts," "education desserts," "moral example desserts."  

       That being said, those which I have met have, at one distant point in their lives, had options.  Had been members of households.  Had been fed a warm meal by someone who cared about them.  

   

Mauricio:
His first night staying at Glide.  I stood and chatted with him while he waited for a bed.
 He explained to me the responsibilities we carry as "privileged" individuals.
Mauricio is a smart guy.

       Let me be frank.  I do not think it is possible to completely understand such broad concepts as poverty or homelessness.  The root, the psychology, the complete story is very subjective and nearly impossible to grasp.  I will venture however, that its roots do exist solely in the mind.  There are a hundred different reasons why people end up out on the street.  The cases I have witnessed generally revolve around circumstances of drug addiction, alcoholism, mental illness, etc.  At a point, when these individuals have fallen far enough, they forget about an inherent part of themselves.  "Choice".

"Out there? ... Out there, there are no choices."  

-Chef Bruce Mckinney     

         So in comes Glide's idea.  At Glide, they understand food to be pure, to be beautiful, to have a direct-link-to-the-soul.  They believe that cooking food can be a catalyst.  "what if we implant a conscious choice into a person's life?"

       How? 

                 With a meal.  

       When asked, "What would you like to eat?"  in lieu of  "What is cheapest to eat?" or "What is easiest?," something triggers in the mind.

"What would you like to eat?"

       Old sparks begin to fire.  Long forgotten recesses of the mind are accessed again.  Dark, dusty archives of memory open back up to reveal a certain smell, or a feeling, or the look on your mother's face while your family sat around a table and bonded over her pot roast.

Joanne, "Mama":
A former client of Glide.
Now she runs the dinner service.

"Ohh, I remember... I think I would like to have that."

       All of a sudden, the concept of "choice," of individual pride, is introduced.  This, all through the medium of a fucking pot roast!  The meal acts as a gateway experience to becoming human again.  After this first step has been made, the idea of self improvement will eventually emerge from the fog.  From this, we can see that the kitchen table can truly be a sacred place.  That food can be a vehicle of empowerment.
       Hype, hysteria, food trucks, foams, Michelin stars, micro arugula, Food Network, Bourdain, criminalized foie gras, Noma, Chipotle, balloon food, Michael Bauer, The Laundry, pork buns, smearing purees, Chang, "essence of", tweezers, olive oil-ice cream... all aside;  are we now beginning to see the potential power of food and its place in our culture?

"Food is a tool."

-Chef Bruce Mckinney 

      Glide facilitates this concept quite nicely.  It was "Choice Saturday" when I worked in the kitchen.  Options between King Salmon and Smothered Lamb were being offered.  Vegetarian options (as always) were offered as well.  I did not understand the depth of this small gesture until I was actually able to sit down and speak with the Chef.

She takes pride in her cooking

      Chef Bruce Mckinney, a jovial character plagued with an underlying current of stress; he is in control of the entire meals program at Glide.  Lucky for me, he was happy to kick back for an hour and drop some wisdom.
      I walked down the linoleum-tiled hallway toward his office.  Passing by, one by one, glittery smiley-face stickers and post-it notes stuck to the heavy brown doors on either side of me.  I was overtaken by the smell of generic cleaning solution and body odor.  All of the interior colors were orange and brown.  I felt like I was back at my old elementary school.  The same style, asbestos-lined building which hadn't been renovated since the seventies.

      After a knock on his door, Chef Bruce called me into his office.  He took off his glasses and wiped his eyes, taking a break from what he was typing on the computer screen.  He asked me, what was my intention with this project?  Why was I here?  Before any response could be given, Chef Bruce proceeded to completely open up.  An hour of unbroken conversation unfolded.  

       His attitude toward his job was magnificent.  So special in the way that he expressed his love and empathy for the clients he deals with, but also his blunt frustration, and at times, despair over coming to work.  It is a cruel dichotomy which is impossible to ignore.

       His storied past makes him perfect for the job.  A certain level of "understanding," which not everyone may have, is required to do this work successfully.  He understands that his duty as a chef is to not only feed and nourish the physical body, but the emotional as well.  This, I know, is a recurring theme that, no matter the level, any chef in this town will stand behind.  It is his empathy towards his clients which qualifies him.  His underlying passion and drive to make this Free Meals Program more than just as "band-aid," puts this site right at the fore-front of my little project.

       It's cold out today.  wind whips through the Capital Building Green and funnels down Market Street.  I want to light a cigarette, but I withhold.  I know, at the distant site of a burning cherry, I will be motioned by a shaky hand to spare a smoke by every person in a one-block-radius.  I just don't have the energy to say "nah, sorry man," to that many people right now.
       A silver Maserati kicks up a spin-drift of dead leaves and garbage as it speeds towards the Financial District.  This ever-present juxtaposition of social class seems to be synonymous with San Francisco.  Should I feel guilty?  Is it my responsibility to shelter the homeless?  To feed the starving?  Why has Glide decided to take on this task?  Even they do not believe they can eradicate poverty.
       Understand, this is not something to be "cured" like a disease.  This is not the goal.  The goal is to find a cure for hopelessness.  This I believe, can be achieved.  It is a reality which will not go away any time soon, but hope can still be found.  Sometimes people just need to be picked up off of their knees.  Glide has shown me the spiritual benefit of food.  Congruent to attending a church service; sitting down to eat can feed the soul.  It is powerful enough to pull someone from the gutter and breath new energy into a deflated life.  When the hollow pangs of hunger and depression set in, a meal cooked with care can be a lifeline.  We as cooks are proponents of a human tradition essential to existence.  The next time you pick up your knife or flick on a burner, think about the act you are undertaking.  Think about the how fortunate we are to participate in this unassailable tradition.  Understand what it means to feed someone.